First of all-forgive me if I hyperly (Is that a word? I have no idea) ramble through this post. I broke my one-cup-of-coffee rule earlier, and I'm caffeinated! (Cue the simultaneous eye twinkle, frozen smile and oven-timer bell).

Since my last post, I have cut-back on the TV usage. Although I totally divulge on Thursday nights and watch all my faves. I started running as well. I know this seems a little counter-intuitive to those of you who have read some of my other blogs (or have just observed me walk at some time or another) because you've probably noticed that I'm not very gazelle-like. Yeah, yeah go on and flashback to all the clumsy stuff you've read about or seen me do;

I watch an obscene amount of television. Syndicated, new, made for tv movies, sitcoms, dramas, reality, how-to...I love it all. When I was little, I had restricted TV time (about 30 minutes a day), and even though we had only a handful of channels, I was always sad when it was time to push the OFF button.

After tonight, I can answer this quite concisely:

Quadratic Equations with Irrational Answers.

My brain is not equipped for math problems with lots of steps and formulas. Try as I may, I will undoubtedly forget a sign or transpose a number here or there and be left with the algebraic equivalent of a hobo's crack-induced street rant.

Sometimes when I'm in the middle of an especially tedious equation, I will imagine this other universe; one where the "mathy" people go when they are working out problems. It's called "Matharnia," and it's a magical place filled with all sorts of wonderous sights. The skies are a perfect ratio of blue to yellow, and unicorns fly in synchronized patterns.

They were the most awesome shoes ever. Clear vinyl spectators with a black patent toe and heel with chunky rubber soles that glowed in the dark. In all of my 11 years, I had never witnessed the coolness that emanated from the display wall of Journeys on that fateful day. I had to have them, and the spark of wonder that glinted from my eyes was enough to melt the heart of one of my parents (I can’t remember which one) and sway him/her to buy them for me.

It was the spring of 1994, and 15 to 20 of my fellow classmates and I gathered in the high school gym. As I followed the rest of my friends into the girl's locker room, the impossibly low ceilings and dingy cinderblock walls reminded me of medieval dungeons or ancient catacombs. Not so much because of their appearance, but rather because of the dread I felt for what came next:

I love school breaks. At the end of every semester there is a bright and magical "No-School Zone." During this short window of time, I can get a few things done, but better than that, I can amuse myself . Even with a yucky sinus infection, the sun is shinier, songs sound better, and I have the ability enjoy enjoyable stuff...apparently my vocabulary hasn't caught up with all of this wonderfulness (?), but you get the point.